So, I haven't updated in weeks. See, I wanted as many people as possible to see the Immigrant X post, so I decided to leave it up for a few days. Then I forgot about everything and did nothing productive for a week. But now I'm going to be good now until I lose interest again.

So, here's what I would do if I were Bush.

First, find one of those good targets that Iraq is famous for having, and just bomb the fuck out of it. Make sure there are terrorists in it.

Next, declare victory again. Don't involve the phrase "mission accomplished" or any banners, or people will get suspicious.

Finally, invade Vietnam.

Yeah, you heard me. They're communist AND Asian, and between this and the surprising lack of any moral objection I've heard of to The Vietnam War: The Video Game plus any of the generic "we could have won in Vietnam if it weren't for those damn terrorists* at home" talk that I hear constantly, you know it would go over well with enough people to keep the approval ratings up.

It worked in Afghanistan. Interestingly enough, you can still get news from Afghanistan, and you can kind of predict the sort of thing they have to say. Hey, we're still here, we're just totally fucked over. Thanks for leaving before you accomplished anything. Love, Afghanistan.

It doesn't say that right this second, but scroll down.